Read the operating system book for 1 and 30 hour today , wanted to read more but my brain wasnt grasping anymore maybe some part of it is because of the drain and some because of shit going on around my environment , i feel so much anger because i cant do anything , things that are supposed to be helping me , destroys me . this has been going on arounf 5 years now, i wonder if there would come a time when this would stop , is it just current circumstances or the entire society is like this , some how always adversarial to my dreams , wants and hopes

anyway - did japanese for 1 hour 15 mins worked in smtp project in the morning for like about 3 hours

today is yet another sunday

i wish to start a habbit of watching relaxing nature videos or ambience vlogs of cities of japan and probably other countries as well i was thinking of doing it in the morning as soon as i wake up for like 15- 30 mins but waking up at morning is real tough task not because of i cant wake up (alhough sometimes that is the case) but most of the time my work meetings extend in night and i even if i put on the habbit of going to bed early it would break very quickly and i sleep schedule would be fucked again.